One More Thing

   I have a hard time asking for help for myself. I would much rather ask for someone else other than myself. One thing that is essential for me in the field is a working laptop, not only to be able to document people and places along the way, but to be able to write what I write when the moments hit. I have tried many other methods and means, but as some of you who have followed my 'writings from the road', 'randoms', and any other of my stuff along the way, for some reason it is just the easiest for me to be able to type it out on a keyboard, I'm not sure why, but it is what it is. The other issue with that is that I must strike when the iron is hot, otherwise my thoughts tend to get lost in the wind, and is either never conveyed as well as when the emotions are fresh in my skull, or, it never gets written at all. My last laptop unfortunately was 'built incorrectly' as I was told by a good friend who attempted to fix it, when it was rebuilt, a necessary heat shield was not placed inside causing the board to overheat and fry it. So, in that, I need a laptop to be able to accurately document things when they happen, as they happen. I am putting this out there in the hopes that I can hopefully find a solution, and continue to do the work that I do, the best that God allows me to. I love each and every one of you and God does too. LLLAKYFOTPA

Trials and Tribulations

     I have decided to place my personal writings in Papabear's Den and write work related things into Stories of Hope. I have gotten away from writing lately for personal reasons, well, let's face it, sometimes life gets too busy. For me, one of the first thing I tend to do is focus on other things than my own issues. Why do we do that? I like to think because when standing outsside the box we are sometimes able to better address the issues, the problem with that is that I tend to lose focus on what I ned to do for myself. Sometimes, it is easier to 'dodge' my personal issues. I have been called the 'artful dodger', if something starts slowing or becomes difficult, that I will grab another task that waits in the wings to attack and let the other task become stagnant. The issue with that is that if the issue is not properly addressed, or properly wrapped up so that it can be adequately shelved, it becomes an anchor and not just a shelved item. It can not only become an issue, but can actually stunt forward progression or growth.
     I love my job, I get to be with people and hopefully help them along with the problems or issues at hand, the issue with that, I sometimes have to rip open my ribcage and stare directly into my own fears and past issues on a daily basis. Which can be a good thing, if I let myself look into it and conceptually work at it, but if I take that festering wound and attempt to cover it, without not only addressing it, but taking the time to take out the infection, use the proper salve, and then let it begin to heal, it can become infected and begin to become a larger problem than it was originally. I was once asked, 'what does it take to do what I do?', the best answer I could have at the time, 'be able to have your heart broken 1000 times a day'. Well, in that, there is alot of truth, but at the same right, it can be overwhelming at times. This is one of these times.
    I have not been at the shelters much lately, I have been out in the streets and campgrounds mostly, 'campgrounds?' you may ask. Yes, campgrounds, there are hundreds of campgrounds around the cities, not city or state areas dedicated to swimming, campfires, volleyball, and such, but places, some so close that if you looked hard enough, you would be suprised. I will not give out any locations of such camps, but I will tell you that I have stood in campgounds not only in the cities, but I have yet to find one suburb that doesn't have some type of campsite. Yep, that's right, I have been throughout the metro suburbs and stood in campgrounds. The difference? The city seems to be mostly single adults. The suburbs? Families, yep, families. Too often I have heard the story, mom lost her job, but that was ok because dad still had his, then dad lost his job, we lost the house, and here we are. Why? because, I felt a need to make necessary connections there. My feeling was only accentuated when one of the folks who works for a local shelter asked me, 'Where have you been? I haven't seen you around.'. I replied that I had been in the camps, at which point they asked how many camps. I told them apporximately how many camps and how many people. To that they replied, 'What are they gonna do this winter?! We are already turning people away, and it's summertime, what are we going to do this winter?!'. To which I replied, 'Exactly'.
     Every year, in the most prosperous nation in the world, people freeze to death. How is that possible? How can I be talking about winter on a beautiful August day? I have been letting this fester since the first cool breeze came in from Canada a short while ago. Reflecting on one of the many stories told to me by the brothers and sisters I have met along the way. One of my brother's sat with tears in his eyes and told me how all of the shelters were full, emergency and regular. So, when the MN deep freeze hit, a week of sustained double digit negatives, he was 'lucky' enough to have enough blankets and sleeping bags to hunker under in the abandoned trailer of a semi truck. He would only venture out for a few short minutes to grab ice and snow to put it in his thermos so he would have water, urinating in a bottle under the blankets so he would not be exposed to the elements and 'holding it' as long as he could each time for the other, so he would not be exposed to the elements. Now, I know what many of you are thinking. You may be thinking of the stereotypes that you think of in homelessness. Let me tell you, my brother is so far from that, 14 years ago he was a bike courrier who was hit by a cab while working, it actually made the paper and he carries the story around with him. The cab company settled with him at a standard that most of us would scoff at, but for him, a minimally educated man, who just worked hard and lived minimally, it seemed like a windfall, even if it left him permanently disabled. Now, he lives in a campground, after last winter he has spent most of his summer 'preparing', since for him, 'there's no end in sight, other than death'.
    Worst part, that's just one of the many stories of those who are getting ready for winter. So, in that, this is one of the thousands of reasons that I do what I do. I love each and every one of you and God does too. LLLAKYFOTPA
    

Support and its importance

Yesterday an issue was brought to my attention, I have been talking to a young couple quite a bit lately, they live in the DDC. The girl is pregnant, and is about 7 months along, both of them have stories of hard lives and trying to make decisions in tough situations, and it ultimately bringing them to homelessness. The girl approached me, and asked a simple question. ‘Hey Preach, I know you guys help people, well, I need help.’ I quickly asked how could I help. She replied, ‘My grandmother died, and her funeral is tomorrow.’ She looked away and in a quiet voice said, ‘I don’t have anything to wear for the funeral.’ My heart just went out to her, at this point in her life, with a baby on the way, she didn’t even have proper clothes to wear to her beloved grandmother’s funeral.

I was humbled, my mind had been on things that seemed important at that moment, and as I was wondering what I could do, God walked in. One of the folks who has come alongside of BTM is Amy Jones, her and her husband Paul have supported us in times of need, she has created a supply line that she has graciously offered to assist in our Ministry, her’s is called ‘Bag the Cold’. They operate out of the Jones home and have been instrumental in helping us by taking in donations of sleeping bags, blankets, hats, coats, gloves, boots, and many other necessities that have greatly comforted the people that I see everyday. The items have been such a blessing and in God’s infinite wisdom have come to us when most needed, and of course, it is exactly what is need, when it is needed.

I quickly thought to call Amy and tell her of what had been brought before me. As I listed what was needed, a shirt, a pair of pants, and a simple pair of shoes, she responded with, ‘I will have those to you by 2pm’. In a matter of minutes, my prayers had been answered. Amy showed up at the shelter, with the items in tow, and gave them to this gal. I once again stood in awe of God’s work, and the faithfulness of His servants, the clothes fit perfectly, and were exactly what she needed. She was going to go to her grandmother’s funeral  in the proper attire. Now normally, you’d think that would be the end of the story, it isn’t.

One of the folks who saw all of this happen, had to ask. ‘What makes you give a (expletive) about us?’ Normally, I would have said, ‘it’s what we do.’ But the man who asked the question is a man known only as Caveman, he has been known to have a difficult demeanor for the most part, and is one of the ‘hardcore’ guys down there. I looked at him and said, ‘because it is what we are supposed to do.’ He just looked at me. ‘Why?’ he replied. ‘Because that’s what God would want me to do.’ I answered.  ‘for a while I lived at the Four Ten.’ He looked at me and just kinda half smiled, and said, ’wow, you must be one tough mother(expletive), that place was no joke.’ The Four Ten was a homeless shelter for women and children, and when I spent my time there, was when Minneapolis was becoming ‘murderapolis’ for the first time. It was a shelter that became so ridden with crime and drugs that the city decided that nothing could be done to save it, and moved everyone out of it and tore it down, the empty parking lot at the corner of 4^th and 10^th in Minneapolis is all that is left of it. I continued to explain, ‘At more times in my life than I can count, I was blessed to have people just come along, and remind me that I was loved and that my life mattered, and so for me, that’s my job now, and I am blessed to have it, I want to make sure that you guys never forget that there are folks out there who care about you and pray for you every night.

He just looked at me. For the next few minutes we talked of life, spirituality, death, politics, and a lot of other day to day things. It was a great conversation where we laughed and just enjoyed being people with commonalities and good company. As it came time for me to get ready to go I stood up and got ready to go. ‘ain’t ya gonna stay for dinner?’ Caveman asked, as he and Cavewoman(his gal) got into the line for dinner. The line had already expanded to 20 people beyond them, and at least 100 before them. Cavewoman quickly said, ‘You’re with us, just jump in line.’ Who could say no to that. We talked of more, which I will let you know more of later as I may be enlisting some help from some of you for a very righteous cause. The short and skinny of it is that Cavewoman’s son was killed while riding his bicycle when he was hit by a bus. One of his favorite things in the world was to fish, and with some of your help, I would like to take Caveman and Cavewoman fishing somewhere locally where we can spend the day in a boat fishing, and at the end of the day Cavewoman can spread her son’s ashes. So, just let me know via here or just give me a call, if you are interested in helping make that happen. I love each and every one of you and God does too. LLLAKYFOTPA

A Bilble and Rev. Bob Battle

A Bible and Rev. Bob Battle

                On Monday after lunch I was approached by Two Wheeler Greg, he asked if I could possibly give a woman a ride to the clinic. The clinic is just a short walk away from the shelter, I knew the clinic was only a short walk away, but I agreed anyways. As I said yes, Greg said, ‘This is Pat, she is the one needing the ride.’ Pat introduced herself, and thanked me, I think she sensed that I was about to ask her why she was not going to just walk there, and she said, ‘I have fibromyalgia, even short walks for me are extremely painful, my daughter and I both have it, but mine is farther along than hers. I need to get to the clinic so I can be seen and get my medications. I have been trying to get there for a while, but I haven’t been able to, and my medication ran out 3 days ago, and I am in a lot of pain.’ So, I quickly and happily obliged.

                Pat is one of those folks that we are seeing more and more on the streets. She had a professional career, and did quite well for herself. She had raised her daughter Brianna by herself, but was able to push through that and create quite a life for herself. Then her parents got sick, mom first, then dad, and when it was all over the bills from them were too great, and she lost it all. We talked about all of that on the way to and from the clinic. That story will be told shortly as she has agreed to sit with me and share it very soon, but it is from this moment that the other happened.

                On Sunday I had taken some of my guys to church, I have been doing this for a month or so now, and the group keeps on getting bigger. The guys had a blast, my church is a very upbeat church, and everyone I have brought there says they want to come back, and I am praying for some help with that as I only have so much room in my truck, and the number of people wanting to go exceeds the seating in my truck.

                Last Sunday I brought my friend Tawa to church. Tawa is from Belize and is on the far right of the picture posted on the Breakthrough Ministries Facebook page. His only request was for a King James bible, because that is what he preferred to read. I told him that God would provide one, and at the same time, didn’t know how He was going to, because we at BTM are struggling right now. At the same right I knew that God would provide a bible.

                As I dropped Pat off at the clinic, I started to make my way back to the DDC, thinking and praying on how I could find this bible, as I turned the corner from University to Rice street I saw a church I recognized, not because I had attended, but because months before I had been meeting a colleague on the way to a meeting and needed to follow her as I did not know the way to it. She had gotten stuck in this church’s entrance. I remember as we were digging her car out, Pastor Jennie had mentioned, ‘This is Bob Battle’s church, he is a great man of God.’ I had passed the church as I was processing that, but I felt compelled that maybe he could help me, at the same right, it was 11am on a Tuesday, what were my chances of catching him?

                I should have known the answer to that, God put him there right at that moment. For those who know me, you can probably picture the look on his face when I approached him, for those who don’t, let me explain. I am 6’3”, I drive a big ford bronco, and I have both ears double pierced, and I am almost always wearing my black superman baseball cap, and a pair of sunglasses. I have been told that when people first see me, I can seem very intimidating. Either way, Bob had found the need to run by the office with his family in tow, just to stop by for a quick second. As I approached him I could see the tentative look on his face. I was excited so I had hopped down from my truck had approached him saying, ‘are you Bob Battle?!’ he paused, and said, ‘yes, how can I help you?’  I introduced myself and told him how I had arrived at his doorstep, and as I explained ho I had gotten there his demeanor quickly changed. He invited me into the church saying, ‘if you had been a minute earlier or a minute later you wouldn’t have caught me.’ He quickly brought me into the sanctuary and grabbed a brand new KJV bible, and then asked, ‘can I dedicate it to him?’ I responded, ‘I would have it no other way.

                There is still more to the story, but I will finish it later. Either way, God put Rev. Bob Battle and I in the precise place, at a very precise moment to get a job done. So to quote my pastor, ‘PRAISALLUJAH!!!’ I love each and every one of you and God does too. LLLAKYFOTPA

Beauty Is In The Eye Of The Beholder

                Sometimes we get so inundated with the world that we can fail to see the simplest forms of beauty that have been placed right in front of us. We go through our days refusing to see the thing that God placed all around us to remind us that He is who He is, and that His world is filled with splendor and wonder. All we have to do is to remember to be receptive to it and He will open our eyes to His beauty and grace whenever we ask, or choose to see it.

                 The other day a fight broke out at one of the places that I wander through in the day. Now in the world that I walk in, the fights are commonplace, and yet this one was different. Two large men, about my size fighting it out, and the difference, they were both deaf. Their turmoil released in guttural vocals and a fury of fists. God put me in that moment at that moment. I have loved a quote, and I’m not quite sure who said it, but it is, ‘the greatest evil in the world is not when evil men do their evil deeds, but when good men do nothing to stop them.’ I believe that God has changed me in ways that only God could, and so I stepped in. As I seized control of the moment with one of each of the men firmly in the grasp of each hand a 3^rd man, joined in the fray. God gave me the strength and wisdom to keep hold of the two men and also control the 3^rd.

                As the dust was settling I found myself questioning if this was really where God wanted me, where I was supposed to be in life, and if this was where I really was needed. My adrenaline was pumping through my veins like and out of control freight train, and my mind was racing at a million times a minute. Then, one of the gals came over to me, her name is Mary. She is a sweet older woman with a heart of gold. She has had a rough life, and there has been no windfall or help along the way, so she is on the streets. She is small in stature, her hair is medium length and is peppered with streaks of grey and white hair, she has a variety of ailments, she is blind in one eye and has great difficulty seeing out of the other. You would think that she would not be as upbeat as she usually is, and yet in the midst of all of this. Here she had been no more than 10 feet from the fray with pretty much nowhere to run. She literally ran up to me, ‘Preacher!’ she yelled, it was like she could hear my thoughts,  ‘you are our guardian angel when you are here, when you are here we feel safe because we know you will protect us.’ She then gave me a great hug with her frail little arms that took me aback, I didn’t think that arms that size or that aged and frail looking could hold that type of strength. Guess God had answered my question, and also showed me some of His beauty.

                In that, it also reminded me of something else, that there is beauty and wonder in all of God’s creation, and that many times we choose to ignore it. At many of the shelters there is a deep sense of hurt, pain, loss, apathy, insecurity, and a plethora of all things like that, but there is also joy, wonder, grace, peace, and the things of God. At times the latter seem few and far between, and yet they are there, a constant reminder, and our job is to help others see that on a daily basis. To take the times to not only look for it ourselves, but when we find it to be able to show it to others and when it comes down to it, just spread the love, God’s love. I love each and every one of you and God does too. LLLAKYFOTPA

God’s Plan And The Unforeseeable Future

                                    

     In the past few days I have been privileged to see a shift in much of the goings on at the DDC. I have been moved in so many ways, my heart being broken every single day, and never for the same person or situation. In that, I have seen great and wonderful things happen. I haven’t had much time to blog, my laptop is not working too well, and so the only place I can blog is in the office, and my time there, has been fleeting lately. Before I started this journey, my pastor pulled me aside and asked me, ‘Are you ready to go all in? This is a 24/7 job, and I just want you to be ready for that, but now you will be able to walk in my shoes.’ That last sentence reverberates through me at times, not the ‘walk in my shoes’ part, but the 24/7 part. It has been a 24/7 job. My phone rings at all hours, I can be called away at all hours, and the funny part, I love it. God always gives me time for the things in life that He places importance in. I’m not saying that it doesn’t get overwhelming at times, but I choose to remember a two quotes, one from Mother Theresa that I love, ‘God never gives you more than you can handle, I only wish He didn’t trust me so much.’ and one that just came to me when I have been asked a question that seems to be the one that I am asked the most, or when someone comments on things that go on, ‘I just wake up, God does the rest.’ He is the one who carries me through my day every day, and my only job is to let Him do His. In that, like I have said before, He has made many great and wonderful things happen.

     The other day, I ran into an old friend, at the shelter. At one time in our lives we would spend some of the hours of our days talking sports, all types, and all aspects. He would talk of his family, especially his loving wife. I sat there that morning, our study had been on how all of God’s plans were perfect, how we can only see so far, but He can see into eternity. As we were finishing this up, a man walked over to us to say hi, I had seen him before, so many times, and he had always looked so familiar to me, but I just had figured I had seen him on the streets, but when he said, ‘Hello’, it hit me. I knew that hello, I had heard it over and over again, it had been 20 years, but I would know that intonation anywhere. It was Tim, my heart broke. How could this man be here? What had happened?! I sat in stunned silence, so many questions running through my head. I didn’t know what to do. I just stared at him, and he at me, I could see the wheels turning in his head, but he couldn’t make the connection. I looked a little different 20 years ago, and so did he. I wanted to ask so much, and yet I was afraid. I don’t know why, I sometimes forget that nothing is coincidence; everything is part of the plan. I kept on feeling the need to say something, but I just felt ridden by anxiety for the moment.

     A little while later, I walked out the side door, and there he was, headphones on, listening to music, and just staring off into the distance. I took my chance. ‘Do you remember me?’ I quickly asked.  ‘We knew each other about 20 years ago, we used to talk sports for a couple of hours once a week.’ As he looked up, I saw that he remembered, he stood up and hugged me in a great bear hug. ‘I do remember you, how have you been?’ We quickly started talking about things, and then the time came for the question. ‘What happened Tim? What happened in your life that you ended up here.’ As soon as I asked, his eyes welled up. ‘Yeah, I suppose you would probably wonder that.’ I watched this great hulk of a man slowly sit down. ‘My wife got sick.’ I could see and feel his pain; When I had known him before and we had our talks, it would be over and over about how much he loved his wife 20 years ago. How wonderful she was and how blessed he was that a woman like her could love him. I had never met her, but with how much Tim had talked of her back then I remember how his eyes would light up and dance as he touted about how lucky he was to have a woman like her. ‘She got sick,’ he quietly repeated, ‘the doctors said that it would only be a matter of time, and all we could do for it was to medicate her to keep her out of pain and wait.’ I sat in silence; I had been struck mute by the shock of it. ‘After a while the insurance wouldn’t cover it, and she was in so much pain, all I could do was do everything I could to come up with the money for her meds, and take all of the time off of work that I could. She would sit there and hallucinate from both the disease and the meds.’ He quietly said. I couldn’t fathom what it would be like to see this happen. ‘She would sit in her chair, rocking back and forth, her arms and legs would spasm in the last few months, she’d be sitting there and then all of a sudden she wouldn’t be able to stay still, she wanted to stay still, but she couldn’t. By that time she was hallucinating so bad.’ My heart was being ripped to pieces as I could see this man living this over and over in his head. ‘Did you see that cat run under the Christmas tree’ she’d say. He got really quiet at that moment. ‘I’d say, ‘Honey there is no cat.’ and she replied, ‘oh’ and would go back to rocking.

     I sat in a stunned silence, as he continued. ‘Then one night, she was feeling better, she didn’t have to take too many of her meds, and she seemed like she was on an upswing. So I got her dressed and we went out on the town. We just went out and did whatever we wanted to do, and we had a blast, that may be the best 8 hours of my life. We didn’t have a care in the world.’ As he said this, his voice trailed off. ‘…and when I woke up the next day, she was gone.’ My eyes welled up, and I could feel just truly how deeply his love for his wife ran. ‘After that, I had nothing left, no money, my job let me go right after that, and here I am, I wish God had just taken me too.’

     Words cannot explain the rest of it, other than we prayed, and the Holy Spirit touched my brother Tim that afternoon. The funny part, this is not the story, this is only the lead in to the story, but I will save that story for another day as there are places I need to go and folks that will be waiting for me when I get there. To surmise the second part of this though.  God has been using Tim in some great and wonderful ways in the past week, and I just stand in awe at a man who can survive all of this, and rise from the ashes. I love each and every one of you and God does too. LLLAKYFOTPA

...church... a blizzard... and tacos

     So the day started well. Two of my bruthers from DDC had asked if they could come get a ride to church today, so, I went and picked 'em up this mornin'. The trip to church was uneventful, the weather was good, and KTIS was rollin' with some really good stuff this mornin'. As Matt and Greg settled in to the coffee shop I ran to my leadership small group for Skyline. When I returned they were relaxing and just seeming to unwind from being able to not have to be surrounded by the chaos of their everyday life. At church, it was just one of those days. When the sermon just seems God directed, the praise and worship seemed God inspired, one of those times where you could feel it, where if you glanced quickly enough you could catch the angels high fivin' folks as they ran through the place. Then Pastor started his sermon, and as he began, it was everything that Matt, Greg, and I had been talking about all week. Heh, I love how God just does His thing. So there we were and as the end neared there came the altar call. A time when pastor asks folks if they need anything prayed about, and if they do, to please come forward so that a prayer group could pray for them. As pastor was finishing his sentence, Matt headed up, I think I was in awe, two weeks ago, Matt would dodge me like I was the plague at the DDC, and now, he was not only in church, but going forward. I was speechless, I stood in awe for a few minutes and then followed him up to pray with him.
     By the time we got out of church, it had started, the snow was coming, and not only that, but BTM still had lunch to serve. We made the slow trek up 35E, the plows hadn't been able to make it out yet, so we made our own trail. When we got there, the bulk of the BTM frontline crew was already setting up. I said a quick prayer of thanks. One thing, there have been alot of folks who come to the shelter to 'help out', so many different churches, groups, and so on. Well, many of those groups start with a big bang, and then fizzle. Today, BTM stood outside, and brought what we always bring, of course none of that would be possible without the folks who do all that they do and prepare all of the tasty treats. As I walked through the shelter to lets folks know that we were here, I was met with kinda perplexed looks, and alot of  'cool''s. When I was talking to a few of the guys later, I was told, 'you guys are the only guys who keep on comin', the Jesus truck didin't even show yesterday.' The 'jesus truck' is another great outreach who also bring hot meals to folks who need it, but I guess BTM was the only crew on the street yesterday.
     I had a hard moment yesterday, as the Wild game let out the fans cam streaming out of the Exel Center doors. Out of the thousands of people, I sat in silent disgust as folks would go out of their way to not make eye contact or even respond when some of the DDC residents would friendly say, 'Hello', or 'Beautiful day, God bless you.' They filed past the lines with unseeing eyes, unhearing ears, and silence, I was touched when one of the guys from the shelter said, 'I feel sorry for those folks, I'm gonna pray for them tonight.' I dare say we had just as much fun in the snow that we have had in fair weather. It was a great day. I love each and every one of you and God does too. LLLAKYFOTPA

How God walks through the Gates of Hell

     Today was another day of wonderment and awe. It went from watching God walk through the doors, and just trying to keep up. I hear many different references to the DDC. It has been refered to as, The Gates of Hell, The place where angels fear to tread, The Devil's Stronghold, The place where dreams go to die and may other things as such. At the same right, I have heard many positive things. It is hard at times to see the works of God there, you become innundated with so much negativiy at it's primal level. Recently a man was targeted and run down in a parking lot, he was killed, the only thing that people can figure out, he was killed for being homeless. There are also two more 8 x 11 memoriams for two others who no longer roam the halls. Once again, some will ignore the memoriams for they have become numb to them, but you will also see people who will stop, look at them, and write a small note on them, like 'I love you, you will be missed', 'I will miss your smiling face', or 'you are in a place of no sorrow or suffering now, please pray for us that are left behind.' It is a place where people have come when the rest of society has written them off. A place where 'dreams go to die.' And yet, today I was honored to pray for someone new, I listened to a debate between 4 people on how, 'you reap what you sow', was able to play some music with some other talented artists, was asked for a bible, met some new brothers and sisters, was able to give some much needed sleeping and survival equipment to folks who desperately needed it, watched 3 strangers help a man who is terminally ill and on his last leg to get his bed ready, and to hold a bible study. All in one day. God is good.
     The morning had been a good morning, we had been discussing Saul who became Paul, and some of the scripture he had written. I have always felt very akin to Paul, since things in my life have changed some, I can relate, and so can many others. We had been reading 2 Corinthians and discussing it. Funny part, that is how our daily discussions have changed, I have had the priviledge to see the converstions change from, who had what and how was it going to be used for, to everyone sharing their theories and thoughts on so many different sections of the bible and how it related to their lives and how they could just see and feel these things that the bible spoke of. From miracles and wonders to the many temptations that the devil and his crew laid before all of us on a daily basis.  We had all spoke of how we felt, unadulterated and understanding one another. The best part of it, when this started, it was me and Two Wheeler Greg, and now, there are about a dozen of us who join in the debates and conversations. How cool is that?
    We had all gone our seperate ways for lunch, and I was on my way back. I have been told on multiple times that I am allowed very unlimited access to the DDC, it has been a blessing, but at the same right I would prefer to be treated not as staff their, but as if I was a client. In that, I decided to wait outside and just hang out until the doors were unlocked and everyone could come in for dinner. As I stood outside I started hearing a fairly heated debate. As I neared I could hear 3 people distinctly debating hope, sin, 'we reap what we sow', and Lucifer 'the most beautiful angel', I quietly leaned against one of the large concrete columns by the door and just enjoyed the debate. There were 2 men and a woman all talking about how 'God's blessings will flow out on God's time', and how 'we reap what we sow'. As they were debating that, the crowd grew and grew. The doors of the DDC are locked for cleaning until dinner time, but the folks know that the closer you are to the head of the line, the better your chances are of eating a hearty meal. Now on a normal day you can hear the anger, frustration, fear, apathy, and hardship among the crowd. Not today. The crowd seemed transfixed by the whole discussion, they would interrupt from time to time to ask someone to clarify what they were discussing, but the crowd almost seemed intent on hearing what these folks had to say. There were a couple of points while discussing sin, the devil, and how demons could come and fill an empty temple that a few of the folks got very disturbed and walked off, one shouting profanity and blasphemy as he walked away. But even with that, it was a much quieter, more serene dinner crowd at the doors.
     After dinner, I was asked if we could have bible study, I quickly agreed. the best part of that, when we started to settle in and get ready for it, quite of a few of the folks that I have been meeting and speaking with down there found reasons to stop by and ask what we were doing, and then upon finding out quickly asked if they could join us. It was amazing. Also at that time , one of my guitar players stopped by and 'just wanted to say hey', well during that, 'hey', he slipped out, 'i think i might pick up a bible and read it sometime, i might go get one of them that they keep at the motels or somethin..' Yesterday, I had been given a bible by a brother of mine, he had told me. 'this is a recovery bible that I was given when I first went sober, I got a new bible, and I wanted to give this one to you just in case someone needed it.' The reality, the man who 'mentioned' that he was going to steal a bible from a motel so he could read it, is an addict. I just found myself in awe of how God just does His thing. Yesterday I was given a recovery bible, today I had it in my possesion to hand to an addict on a quest for God.
     Two Wheeler Greg found scripture from Matthew that we read and discussed in our bibke study. He has many many study pamphlets that he has kept, 'just in case'. Of course the one he chose fit like a glove. As that ended I was asked to play a few tunes. So Tawa got out his drum, and I grabbed the guitar, and we played songs from John Denver to Bob Marley, and he even started singing along with a worship song that I have been sneaking into the Jam Session every chance I get. As we were praying I watched 3 men, only one of who knew the fourth man personally, lay out his mat and his things and get him ready for bed. He is terminally ill, he is not very mobile at all and uses a walker. The 3 men laid out his mat, got his blankets and sheets ready, and ever so gently lowered this man down to his bed. I could see it from my vantage point where I was playing. Not one man made a crass comment or anything, they just simply and humbly came together to make sure this man would be comfortable for the night, and that he would not suffer any more than he already was. Once he was situated they all went their seperate ways, not asking for anyone's praise or self seeking in any way. Just 3 men helping their brother in a time of need and using love and compassion to make his world better if only for a few minutes.
    I guess all I can really say, in the past few weeks I have been blessed to see a change begin at the DDC, I have seen miracles and wonders. I have seen folks start to hope in a place labeled 'where dreams go to die', and what is hope? a dream. I discussed a thought with one of the newer folks there earlier today. It was said, 'I feel like this is the end of my life, this is where my life has led to, and now, there is nothing left, only me, and I just don't want to be here anymore.' To which I was given to say, 'Have you ever considered that instead of it being the end of your life, it's just the end of a really bad chapter in it, and now you get to start with a completely new chapter, maybe even written by a new author?'. They replied, 'never thought of it that way.'  They then smiled, and during the bible study said some wonderful and profound things about life and chapters. I love each and every one of you and God does too. LLLAKYFOTPA

A day of love

     Today was a phenominal day at the DDC. It was electric, unbelievable, and yet, just God inspired. I have been bringing a brother down to the DDC with me on a regular occasion, his name is Johnny Smith and he is a very impressive man of God, he has jumped into the shelter with both feet which is very impressive, but I suppose when you are able to have a good deep faith base, there is no more fear. As we went through our day it seemed like it was a day of wonder and awe, and love. Not a romantic love, but the true love, an unconditional love for your fellow human being.
     I have had the priviledge to see God not only enter the DDC, but today, I feel like He has really taken root. My new found brother Matt is such a case. Matt was a ward of the state for a long time, a product of foster homes and wrong choices. Well, one week ago, Matt accepted the Lord into his life and has also been sober since then. In that time I have been privy to a beautiful transformation. Matt and I have been down many of the same life paths, a life of violence and addiction. A life of apathy for the world, and selfish ways to make our own ways. In turn I have felt a kindered with Matt almost from the beginning. Two Wheeler Greg introduced me to Matt a short time ago, but since he was in his old life, and I have been doing my best to walk in the new one that I was given, he didn't want to have much to do with me. Until the day that Greg brought him to me and said, 'this is my friend Matt, he was wondering if you would pray for him.' I quickly agreed, I consider it an honor and a priviledge anytime someone requests that of me.
     The center was especially busy that day, and there was alot of commotion, it was one of those days where everyone has a chip on their shoulder and wants to fight. As Greg asked me this question, I caught a glimpse of Matt's eyes, and knew all too well that look, as I had seen it in my own eyes time and time again as I quested to see who I truly was and what my purpose in life was. It was a look of being lost, tired, alone, angry, and afraid. A look of disbelief in myself and if I even had a purpose in life. Before I could second guess myself, I had agreed. Since the DDC was in the stage that it was we decided to head to Listening House, another day shelter where people can escape the streets for a few hours, to try and bring some sanity to their day, but it was also packed to the gills and had the same feeling to it. We requested that we were able to use one of their side rooms, but unfortunately, they were all being used. I could see the desperation in Matt's face, and it was like Johnny could feel the same thing, so we decided to find a quiet place where we could pray, we all hopped into my truck and headed to the Frogtown McD's. When we got there we grabbed some drinks so we wouldn't be ejected for loitering, and prayed. Now, I have been told that I am an awesome prayer warrior, but at the same right, I am not used to holding that title yet, and I may never be, but I started praying. All I can say is thank you God for giving me the words to pray, for it was elegant, precise, and to the point, so, for me, it was His prayer, not mine. As we finished Matt seemed very relieved, and spoke of how he felt better, and what he felt had happened to him during that prayer. It has been almost a week since that day, and in that time Matt has been moving at lightning's pace with his spirituality. He has been reading a bible I gave him almost constanly, praying, and debating biblical scripture with Two Wheeler Greg and the others that have started to amass in our group.
     Which brings me to today, I had headed down to do my thing, and had a great and wonderful morning with the folks down there, had run to check on a few of my guys who are not shelter folks, I guess I'll call them the Frogtown Wendy's Crew. I had returned to the DDC and was headed back to see Matt, I had told him that I would walk with him to a place close by so he could get a new t-shirt, as the one he was wearing was way too large and had seen much better days. We tend to travel in packs down there as it is a place where anything can happen in the blink of an eye, and there is safety in numbers. As I approached the courtyard, I could see Matt sitting with Greg and a new person. Her name is Nikki, she was originally from Ohio, and had run away from an abusive household at a young age, she had made her way across the United States to Portland to where she had lived a vagabond lifestyle for many years. Somehow she had made her way back east, and was trying to start over, I think we all know how that feels, just trying to get a good start, trying to start over. As I approached, I heard her say, 'I hate God, all I can think about is how come He left me like this.' After a life of addiction to escape the torments of her past, she has multiple health issues, and has not had the ability to properly take care of herself. 'I sometimes feel like He doesn't hate me, but I hate Him.' As I was trying to figure out how to softly address this, Matt spoke up, I would love to be able to type down what he said, but I think I was as transfixed by his words as she was. He was eloquent and soft, and expressed his life, and how God had fashioned him a new life, and how his feelings toward God had mirrored hers, until that day at McD's. I was floored. As I sat there in shock, Matt, looked at me and said,'hey Preach, can we pray for her?' I could feel the angels cheering, but that cheer was about to turn into a deafening roar, he finished with, 'and if it's ok with you, I would like to lead the prayer.' I could feel my eyes well up behind my sunglasses, I quickly agreed.
     As many of you know, it has been a overcast day, we bowed our heads and started to pray. Once again, Matt came forward with this regal eloquence, and once again I would love to type out exactly what he prayed, so I could share it with you, but I was lost in the moment. The most wonderful part, as we began to pray, lierally as we all bowed our heads and became lost in the prayer, God opened the clouds and we were able to bask in the sun's glow, the sun stayed out for the prayer, and then quickly was covered again by the clouds as we came to 'amen'. I can say that not one of us was untouched for that breif moment. We then spent the rest of our day discussing what had happened, and how God had lead each one of our lives to that single moment. I think that we all would agree, if we had not led our lives in any other way, we would not have all been in the same place, at the same time, for that precise moment. The question that is asked alot down there, and I am willing to believe, many other places, is this, 'Why does all of this stuff happen in my life, why?' Well, for me, today, if I hadn't led my life the way I had, every single moment, every single second. That moment may not have happened, many of the most wonderful wonderous moments of my life may not have happened, because by sopme other decision, I may have not been able to make it to that moment. I pray that we all realize that our God is an awesome God, and every plan that He has is perfect, even if we cannot see His plan, we must learn to trust in Him and believe that if we have faith, He will show us His plan. In His time, not ours. LLLAKYFOTPA